Anti-Mormon Literature Response

I have lead a pretty sheltered life as far as anti-Mormon literature is concerned. I grew up in a place where everyone was a member of the church. It wasn't until my mission when I really came across much of it for the first time. I mocked it as being pretty much 'National Inquirer' level stuff. After I got home from my mission I found out that a friend of my father's had left the church and started an anti-Mormon newsletter. He sent us one, and I took the liberty of writing a rebuttal. It was kinda fun - perhaps the blogger in me was already started. The newsletter really only strengthened my testimony because of the easy explanations I found, and besides this guy was always a bit of a nutcase.

Last Saturday two events occurred that will forever change my view of anti-Mormon literature and the effect it can have.

The first event happened that morning at work. Another engineer who was my cubical neighbor had quit and Friday was his last day. On Friday night he built what seemed to me to be a monument to himself out of several empty coffee cans in the shape of a pyramid on his desk. He had a few copies of his resume laying around, a farewell letter from himself, and a bunch of 'Jesus is Lord', and 'Jesus Saves' pictures that he had drawn all over his office. And then I noticed on his keyboard an anti-Mormon pamphlet with the words 'The Truth Shall Make You Free' written on a sticky note. With the very small number of Mormons at this place, I felt that the pamphlet was mostly left for me. Why would he feel the need to do this as part of his good-bye? I had felt that we had gotten along quite well. This is the aspect that changed my view of anti-Mormon literature. The content had not changed, but this time it came from someone I had considered a friend.

I took the pamphlet off his keyboard and was about to throw it away. As I thought about it I decided to respond to it. He left it for a reason right? The bloggernacle is wearing off on me, so I got his personal e-mail address of his resume and decided to send a rebuttal. I tried to be constructive in my defense, so if there was a sincere truth seeker inside him it could be helpful. But I kind of doubted it would have much of an effect. I wondered if I was doing the right thing the whole time.

On Monday he sent a reply to me. He made a few additional Mormon jabs, but overall it was a positive reply. He apologized for leaving the pamphlet behind. He the did something I did not expect. He testified to me of his religious beliefs. I had never really experienced that before. I had people tell me I was deceived lots of times. I have heard people say simple things like 'Jesus is Lord' before, but nothing like what I would consider a positive and meaningful testimony. This is part of what he said:

You see Eric, I am a Christian. That means i Beleive Jesus died for my
sins and the sin I was born with. I have asked him to forgive me for that
sin and he has covered it with his atoning blood. I believe the thief on
the cross was forgivien and lives in heaven with Jesus even though he didn't
do any good works. All the good works we do are like filthy rags to God.
All he wants is my life, all of me.

Of course there are some things here that I have a problem with, but after this, I had no more desire to debate. I thanked him for sharing his religious beliefs, let him know there were no hard feelings, wished him well, and clicked send. I thought of the many times I was only getting into contention on my mission when I decided to just bear a simple quick testimony and try to leave on good terms, and now it had happened to me. I hope that I didn't mess things up and that we really did part on good terms.

The second event was that on the same day my oldest son received an e-mail from a friend at school that was basically a cut and paste of anti-Mormon statements. My son is 13. I am thinking about calling the boys parents to see if they would mind if we sent a reply and going through the issues with my son as a learning experience. I'm not sure what is best here. Is it better to try and respond to this stuff, or just throw it away. Anti-Mormon literature is different when it comes from a friend.

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Fullness of the Gospel: Life Before Birth

I have been a little bit surprised that there have been so few comments on the improvement to the Ensign the last few months, particularly the addition of 'The Fullness of the Gospel' series. This is a series explaining the basic beliefs of the restored gospel, doctrines unique to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

In the February Ensign the article was titled, 'Life Before Birth'. The first part of the article expressed how important it was to have a knowledge of the doctrine of pre mortal life. Boyd K. Packer is quoted as saying, 'When we understand the doctrine of pre mortal life, then things fit together and make sense'.

I would like to review the important aspects of the preexistence in this article.

Our intelligence has always existed, and had no beginning.

At some point spirit bodies of matter were created for us, and we became literal spirit sons and daughters of heavenly parents.

We have the potential to become like Him.

We come to earth without memory of our prior existence.

These items seem very 'small and simple', but it is amazing how many things fit together and begin to make sense if we keep these simple things in mind as we discus other aspects of the gospel. The above items have been very important to many of my recent posts and comments.

I have been studying a little about the preexistence and found a great article from the January 1989 Ensign and I am making a post based on this article on the Blogger of Jared here.

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My Second Honeymoon with the Bloggernacle

Some of you may remember me writing a post called 'My Bloggernacle Honeymoon is Over' about two months ago. At the time the initial excitement about finding the Bloggernacle was finished and I was questioning the value of the entire experience up to that point. I was sincerely at the verge of ending the experience and doing something else with my small amount of free time. I was expressing two areas of value at that time - the value I was getting from the Bloggernacle and the value I was contributing to the Bloggernacle.

Well, it has been two months, a very long time in Blog years, and I am still as 'active' as ever, maybe more so. What has helped me decide to stick around? Actually, several things.

I received quite a bit more response than I ever imagined. Some from very unexpected sources. It made me aware that even though comments were low, I was not as ignored as I thought. Since then I installed a site meter. This allows me to see how many people visit the site. When I don't post for a few days visits go down to single digits, when I post something visits may go up to between 50-100. So it appears to be a legitimate thing. Don't tell me if it is not.

I received lots of good advice. One piece was from Stapely who said to write for yourself. Since then I have looked at this site as a type of open journal. I have never kept much of a journal, even on my mission. Perhaps this will be part of the record I leave behind. Perhaps my kids will one day find this of value to them.

When I first found the MA, I tried to read everything from everybody. Yes, I am serious. Since then I have become much more discriminating about what I read. There are a handful of sites that I read pretty much everything they put out. A few sites that I read stuff that catches my eye. And a few sites I may never read again, depending on the guest blogger. This has perhaps lowered the total value I get because of good stuff that I miss, but has greatly increased the value per hour.

Then I was asked to guest blog at Blogger of Jared and to become a permanent part of their group. This was unbelievably flattering to me. I confess to sometimes feeling a lack of acceptance in this Blog world. Much of that comes from issues within me. But this invitation came from out of the blue. I am not a real-life friend or relative of either Wade or Ryan. It appears they felt I had something of value to contribute. What an honor for me.

I admit that I was a little worried about the 'orthodox' label that BofJ was going through at the time. And that perhaps that label was a dirty word on the Bloggernacle. Perhaps any negative perception of that label would reflect on me. I have decided not to worry about it and just be myself and see what happens. Besides, I am a fairly conservative dude who is very supportive of the church and its leaders anyway.

I have been pleased with my experience at the BofJ and here. I have decided to do both. I am very excited about the whole thing and look forward to the experience.

So, I think going on a second honeymoon with the Bloggernacle is a good idea. Where would you like to go?

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Goals, Gimmicks, and Guilt

Any of you who have followed my posts and comments know that I look at the church through a very positive lens most of the time. I do believe that the gospel of Jesus Christ is true, and that the church is true as far as it is administered properly. And it should really be of no surprise to anyone that it is not always administered properly, in fact I think it would be unrealistic to expect anything else.

I do have a short list of gripes at times, and among them is the occasional behavior of local church leaders when the first get a little authority (D&C 121). I have seen a familiar pattern a few times. Goals, Gimmicks, and Guilt.

Set high performance goals on the group you are called to lead, create a few gimmicks to get people to do what you want, pass out guilt if goals are not met. Seen this before?

Ok. rant over. I saw a nice post by Keryn at PonderIt that I recommend here. She talks about the virtues of sitting through boring meetings. There is something Christ-like about supporting people in their callings even if they are not doing all that well in them.

The church is on the right track however. I have made a guest post at Blogger of Jared about what qualities the church looks for in leaders. It does not include goals, gimmicks, or guilt. Read about it here.

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Doctrine Regarding Root Beer Floats

The youth and youth leaders in my home ward appear to have chosen root beer floats as the refreshment of choice for their activities. That suits me fine, I love 'em too. I don't expect to have any problems in the spirit world knowing which side is paradise. It is the side with the root beer floats.

There is a problem however with the way that the root beer floats are made. I have been quite surprised that local leaders have not stepped in to rectify the situation. I did a quick search at lsd.org and other sources, and was disappointed that the doctrine of root beer float making has not found its way into authorized sources. Those who are in tune with the spirit, however, will recognize the proper procedure when they consider the options. The proper procedure for root beer float making is as follows:

Pour some root beer into a glass.
Add some ice cream.

Any deviation from the above sequence is not in harmony with the spirit. There is some symbolism to this sequence when we consider the first ordinances of the gospel. Baptism of course is represented by the root beer. The white ice cream symbolizes the holy ghost. If Bruce R. McConkie were alive today, he would probably make other methods of making root beer floats as the eighth heresy.

People who violate the above order (such as putting the ice cream in the cup first, and then the root beer) are on a slippery - or should I say frothy - slope. Well might it be said of them, verily they have their reward. That reward is a life filled mainly with froth and little substance.

Beyond the obvious symbolism previously mentioned there are practical considerations as well. Placing the root beer in the glass first is the only method of reliably controlling the root beer to ice cream ratio. Other methods can lead to disaster.

This may seem like a minor indiscretion, and it is. But if not corrected can lead to other, more serious sins such as having ice cream and cake at a birthday instead of cake and ice cream. Or worse yet, pie.

Please spread this message to all you know. A lifetime of joy can replace a frothy probation for someone you care about. I think I am going to run to the store now. I have a good idea what we are going to have as a treat for family night.

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Are you a Minister?

I have had the privilege of being the home teacher for Paul and Dawn Rooyakkers for about 10 years. I do not remember missing a single month. Much of this is because they are very accommodating with their schedule, and because if the end of the month starts creeping up they call ME to arrange a time. Wonderful people. I have been their only home teacher during their entire marriage I believe.

When they had their first child there were some complications, and Dawn needed a surgery after the labor was over. I do not know the details, but she was told that it was possible for her to have more children, but not as likely.

Several years went by without a much desired pregnancy. They eventually asked me to give them what turned out to be a series of priesthood blessings in the hopes of having more children. This was a little awkward for me because I knew there was a possible medical reason for them not being able to have children. They wanted a possible miracle, and hoped that I could be the voice of such a miracle. I was pleased to do this for them however, and after some prayer and fasting gave them each a blessing.

I particularly remember the blessing given to Paul. As I laid my hands upon his head I clearly felt the words, 'You may bless him with anything he wants' enter into my mind. What a privilege it is to give such a blessing! I was able to give them a bold, confident, positive blessing.

More years passed with no pregnancy. They eventually began the process of pursuing adoption. During the time of filling out papers, and everything else involved the sought for blessing came, and they were pregnant. A few tear filled testimonies of gratitude graced our testimony meetings, and lessons, and visits.

The pregnancy went well and the time for delivery came. I got a call from them in the middle of the night. The labor was not going well, and they asked if I would come to the hospital and give them a blessing. It was not an emergency, just a stubborn labor. I was so honored that they would think of me at such a time as this. Dawns father had died by this time, and Paul is the only member in his family. I was glad to get dressed in my Sunday best and get to the hospital.

Because of the late hour, the hospital was closed, and I had to go in through the emergency room doors. When I came in a nurse at a desk near the entrance asked if she could help me. I told her that a couple from our church was having a baby, and the labor wasn't going well, and they had asked me to come and give them a blessing. Keep in mind this is Michigan. The nurse asked if I was a minister. Without hesitation I said yes.

She immediately stood up from her chair and said to come with her. She lead me to the OB area. She told the nurses at the station there that I was a minister and had come to give the Rooyakkers a blessing. The OB nurse also immediately stood up and lead me to the room. I was not used to being treated like a minister! I was able to assist Paul in giving his dear wife a blessing, had a quick chat, and left the labor to the professionals there.

Thankfully everything went well and there is now a very active little boy named Christian Alexander Rooyakkers. And by the way, he has a sister on the way apparently.

I have thought at times if I was perhaps a bit deceptive in saying that I was a minister. I am sure that what the nurse meant was a minister like the local Baptist minister, or Methodist. But as a home teacher I have a calling to minister to the needs of a small group of families. My flock. I teach, preach, expound and exhort the gospel of Jesus Christ. I administer to their wants and needs as appropriate. I am a minister to them.

If you are a good home or visiting teacher, may god bless you for your efforts. If you are not doing well with such an assignment, and want a chance to experience a little pure religion in you life, get up and do your home or visiting teaching. You are a minister. Start acting like one.

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Choosing Free Will over Determinism

I read with interest the Fullness of the Gospel series on Agency which addresses free will. This has caused me to contemplate the lyrics to a great song called 'Free Will' by my favorite music group RUSH. The lyrics to me seem to take one through the process of naive free will, to determinism, to choosing free will over determinism, or what may be called enlightened free will. Those of you who know me a little know that these are words I barely even know. I am like a fish out of water here, but I would not mind increasing my understanding of this type a thing, at least a little.

Does this song not suggest that we have the ability to choose not just our actions but our view of life? Is choosing free will in itself a defining moment of taking responsibility for your actions? Is this the type of choice all of us made in the council of heaven, and the same type of choice made in the Garden of Eden.

I may not know much about philosophy, but I will choose free will. I would be glad to read any straight forward thoughts on my comments here or the lyrics to 'Free Will'. I realize that parts of this song may imply an atheist conclusion, but hey it's just a rock song. The important part to me is the choice of a free will approach. A choice which I have made.

Free Will, by Neil Peart

There are those who think that life has nothing left to chance,
A host of holy horrors to direct our aimless dance.
A planet of playthings,
We dance on the strings
Of powers we cannot perceive
"The stars aren't aligned -
Or the gods are malign"
Blame is better to give than receive.

There are those who think that they were dealt a losing hand,
The cards were stacked against them - they weren't born in Lotus-Land.
All preordained-
A prisoner in chains-
A victim of venomous fate.
Kicked in the face,
You can't pray for a place
In Heaven's unearthly estate.

You can choose a ready guide in some celestial voice.
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.
You can choose from phantom fears and kindness that can kill;
I will choose a path that's clear-
I will choose Free Will.

Each of us-
A cell of awareness-
Imperfect and incomplete.
Genetic blends
With uncertain ends
On a fortune hunt that's far too fleet.

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For those about to Speculate

I have made another guest post. This one is about the Holy Ghost maybe getting a body. If you read beyond the words, you may find that the post is as much about my view of proper speculation that the speculation itself. You can read my post here

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With the Saints: 2B or not 2B

I have been honored with an invitation to guest blog at Blogger of Jared. I will be posting there for a couple of weeks, and see what happens from there. I have made a post with the above title than can be viewed here.

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Everything I Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten

I learned a very important lesson during my days in kindergarten. A lesson that has application to every area of life. Hopefully I have learned it well and can always remember it. Consistent application is the key.

I went to an afternoon kindergarten class that was about 2 or 3 blocks away from home. I usually walked both ways. One beautiful day my mom told me that I needed to hurry to school or I would be late. She instructed me not to delay on my way. I tended to be a relatively obedient lad, so I walked quickly to the school.

About half way there I came upon a girl about my age who was riding her bicycle in the street. As we were passing by each other she fell onto the road. It was not a vicious fall, but she was crying pretty hard. She looked up as I was walking by and asked through her tears ‘Can you help me?’

As I considered the situation, the thought came to me – this is just like those stories they tell in primary! What should little Eric do? Deep down inside I knew what I should do. But instead I said, ‘I can’t help you. I’m going to be late for school.’ And off I marched, leaving the girl crying in the road. Quite a guy huh?

I had about a block and a half to walk and think about this event. I knew I had chosen wrong. At a five year old level I realized that I had let blind obedience get in the way of following the spirit. I had let duty get in the way of doing the right thing. As I went down the steps that lead to my class I resolved that I was always going to do what I felt was right, regardless of what anyone else said. Even if it was my mom.

As I have reflected on this experience, I have realized that at that moment I was not much better than those who passed by the robbed and beaten man in the familiar parable of the good Samaritan. Perhaps they were late for a meeting themselves. I have not worried myself to much about this because I was only five and not yet to the age of accountability, so as far as I can see this sin is may parents problem  Sorry mom and dad. You know how it is. I have my own little no-accounts!

Doing what you feel is right regardless of the circumstances is not always easy. I hope I can always stick to the resolve I made that important day on my way to kindergarten.

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Mortality as a Final Exam

There may be those who view this life as a test which will only include a list of do's and don'ts that occur in this mortal life. And if you have enough check marks in the proper column you're in good shape. I do not agree with this notion. Certainly I believe in the commandments and the ordinances, yet I feel that the final judgment will mostly come down to who you are, what you have become, and the progressive path you are on. But even those who agree with this more-or-less so far, may feel that this mortal life is the only criteria, or period of time, that this test will be evaluated on, thus neglecting the pre-existence as a part of who we are, and what we have become.

I chose the term final test for this post to express the idea that our journey through the plan of salvation may be similar to taking a college class with a semester worth of homework, reading, lab work, quizzes, tests, semester projects, etc., and an important final test at the end. This may be more similar if the final test is a very practical, hands-on type of test. If you follow this so far, this would mean that preexistent spirits, on the verge of coming to earth are not idiot infants, but intelligent, mature, capable beings who have made a remarkable amount of progress so far, completing a 'semester' worth of course work. They have learned much and are now ready to take one last practical final exam before receiving their grade or judgment.

If this is a nearly correct way of looking at things, then it may give us a better perspective of how we should work out our own salvation. I also think it answers a few questions. I believe that once we reach the end of our journey and look back we will discover that the path of our existence was more of a smooth continuous path with not so jagged transitions from intelligence, to spirit, to mortality, to spirit world, to a resurrection of glory. One stage leading into the next as a continuation.

There is some scriptural based evidence for significant preexistent progress that I would like to review. This includes:

Jesus as a spirit child of Heavenly Father gaining God hood status prior to being born on earth.

A group of preexistent spirits being referred to as being 'Nobel and great' (Abraham 3:22-23)

Children who die before the age of accountability being celestial (D&C 137:10)

One third of the host of heaven being cast out as a result of the war in heaven (D&C 29:36-38)


The first three go together in my mind. Christ and a certain number of spirits were all noble and great prior to coming to earth. For many of them coming to earth may have been a type of technical necessity. Christ needed to fulfill his role as savior, but his status as a God was never in question based on his preexistent progress. There may have been a huge number of noble and great spirits that may have included all children who die before accountability kicks in. The last piece of evidence I state shows the other side of the spectrum. It appears some spirits may have 'progressed' in the wrong direction to such an extent that they were not even allowed to participate in the plan of salvation. A type of judgment has already occurred for them, having failed the prerequisites for the course.

It seems to me that we existed for a very, very long period of time as spirit beings. It appears we had agency, intelligence, memories, etc., at that time. It is evident that significant progress, even to the status of god hood, was possible during the pre-existence. All that experience and progress has gone into who we are, and will be part of our final judgment. Which leads me to believe that this life is like a type of practical final exam which is a continuation of where we had progressed to prior to entering mortality.

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Atonement as a Process (by John Nielson)

The Atonement of Christ as a Process rather than a Single Event

Many Latter-day Saints, perhaps most, think of the atonement as a single act of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. as he took upon himself the sins of all mankind, suffering great agony such that he shed great drops of blood from every pore. Some expand it to include his suffering and death on the cross since it is said that he died for us. McConkie believed that it "took place in Gethsemane and at Golgotha"(Mormon Doctrine ). Others may expand it further to include his burial and resurrection since it is said that "he lay down his life that he might take it up again" and that "he died that we might live."

I suggest that we should expand it even further to include not only Gethsemane and the Cross but his resurrection and his subsequent Ascension into heaven where he took his place, once again, on the right hand of God and resumed his premortal role as the Great Jehovah. He then became the "Eternal Judge of the Quick and the Dead"(Moroni 10:34). Even now, according to the Book of Mormon, he sits at the Judgement Seat of Christ, judging all men according to the deeds done in the body as they appear before him, each in turn, at some point following their deaths on earth.

I was led to this view by three major considerations: (1) Profound discomfort over the traditional explanations which have God the Father, the embodiment of Eternal Justice, punishing an innocent being, Jesus, for the sins of the guilty, and letting the guilty go free and somehow being satisfied by this that justice had been done. Further, that an innocent being could literally become guilty of the sins of others simply by saying that he accepted their guilt. I found it difficult to get beyond the fundamental point that the guilty are guilty and the innocent are innocent regardless of any claims to the contrary. Actually, I think that Jesus took upon himself our sins, not in the sense that he became guilty of them as Martin Luther taught, but in the sense that he took responsibility for them to see that justice is done in regard to all human sin; (2) Atonement literally meaning at-one-ment or human beings becoming at one with God spiritually, seemed to require human involvement through such things as exercising faith and offering to God some evidence of sincere and humble repentance rather than becoming one with God solely through a single act of Jesus in Gethsemane; and (3) The Book of Mormon repeatedly describes the atonement of Christ as a long process of faith, repentance, baptism, the sanctifying effect of the Holy Ghost, enduring faithfully to the end of one’s life, keeping all the commandments of God, and after all of these steps being forgiven by the power, authority, and grace of Jesus Christ and being perfected in him(Moroni 10:32), reconciled to God(at-oned) and welcomed, guiltless, into his celestial kingdom(2 Nephi 31:17-20 and 3 Nephi 27:14-20). Or, if we have failed to take these essential steps, being cast out into a lesser kingdom, not having become "at one" with God.

How is eternal justice actually accomplished? At least the following steps in the process would seem to be important. The repentant sinner makes whatever restitution he can to those he has sinned against. If he is unable to make full restitution to the innocent victims of his wrong-doing, the Lord makes up the short-fall by compensating the innocent with blessings in the resurrection(Luke 14:14). So justice is achieved in the process of judgement by rewarding the righteous, punishing the unrepentant, compensating the innocent victims of sin, and forgiving the penitent, and only the penitent (Alma 42:--). It is a logical process, not an incomprehensible, magical act.

Thus, the atonement is a process, not a single event. It brings together, not only the suffering and death of Jesus and the shedding of his blood, but his resurrection, his ascension, his role as Eternal Judge at the "pleasing bar of the Great Jehovah," and our own faith, humble repentance, baptism by immersion for the remission of sins, receipt of the Holy Ghost and his sanctifying influence, endurance to the end of our lives, and keeping all the commandments of God. Only after all these steps are taken does the Savior's power to forgive us our sins and to hold us guiltless before God and pronounce us "at one" with him have their full effect.

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Hold on Loosely, but Don't Let Go II

Hold on Loosely, but Don't Let Go.

I have another thought on this principle, completely different from the last.

I have never had any problems with regards to anti-mormon literature. The only problem I have is that it seems to affect other people sometimes. I have tried to think what makes me immune so far. I think it partly has to do with holding loosely to many aspects of the gospel without letting go.

There are a few anchors to my testimony. Existence of God, divinity of Jesus Christ, atonement, resurrection, scriptures are things that I cling to tightly. Almost everything else in the gospel I hold on loosely, but don't let go. With this approach strange statements attributed to Brigham Young, historical problems with the Book of Mormon, Lamanite DNA issues, etc. have little to no affect on me. I don't have all the information, and don't know anyone who does. Why get bent out of shape because of this stuff? Things held in your hand loosely typically will not get bent.

It seems there is some wisdom here, even though I may not have expressed it well. If anyone has any quotes, scriptures, or thoughts on this I would be glad to hear about them. This is a new idea for me.

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Hold on Loosely, but Don't Let Go

Hold on loosely, but don't let go.

Many of you will recognize this as a couple of lines from a great classic rock song by .38 special. If you want to review the lyrics try here. From my understanding of the context of these lyrics they are womanly advice about relationships. I see this type of approach in the proper application of priesthood leadership in D&C 121 when it talks about the proper way to have power and influence in the lives of those around you. I also see some similarities to the thoughts my father posted on Creative Quietude. I feel that I witnessed this approach used successfully with my parents during the period of inactivity in the church of my brother that lasted about 12 years.

My brother and I got along quite well. He is six years younger than I am, but during the growing years the apparent gap was not as large. I was a skinny little kid, and my brother was big, strong and athletic for his age. We were able to play together most of the time more like friends than brothers.

When he was about 16 he decided to stop going to church. I talked with him recently about this and the reason he gave for this was that of feeling he would not live up to the expectations of the church and felt a little guilty about it. He didn't like the feeling so decided to stop going. There were no doctrinal issues apparently. His feelings were very strong. Many parents in this situation might panic. They may say something like - as long as you live in my house you will go to church. My brother said that if this would have been said to him at the time he would probably have left home. This could have caused a great divide that might make coming back more difficult.

After my brother got married, had a couple of kids, and started thinking about what he wanted his life to be like, he eventually decided it was time to go back to church. So he did. Just like that. No big apologies or explanations necessary, no large amount of pride to swallow. He felt good when he came back, and in a few months was ordained to the Melchizedek Priesthood and took his wife and kids to the temple. His return has had a profound impact on me. Don't give up on people. I am so glad that my parents granted him the space he needed, and had the patience and love to allow this to happen. What for years may have seemed like a failure may very well have been exactly what was intended to happen all along.

So hold on loosely, but don't let go.

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